It was a long time not to see you in my vision. You were lost for months, for
years. Many disasters passed over me and you never seemed to cope with them
together. People were taking drugs to make themselves feel relax with unreal
lives in social life. They were getting more and more sluggish. After months, I
went outside to analyze people’s epiphany from my own point of view. One day,
the boy suddenly came towards me and said to me to find who I am. He always
told this until I bought bread to eat and arrived home. Bread was unusual for
me. I have never eaten since you have lost. My body was about to destroy before
reaching the real creature. The death knife was coming towards me. If I was
killed with it, I was going to be destroyed forever. There was no hope. Hope was
hurting. I kept my belief down and tried to end this unnecessary life story. At
that moment, you showed me up yourself again. The clues of life I have became
alive once more. You were my source. You were my target. I started to have a
real life when I make my way to you. Dead life came to an end so the life was
just starting with new reformations. I found a job and built a land on which
people got rid of their busy world life and reach to their own personality. You
were always with me, as well. You put the way the formal businesses. Happy land
was a perfect creation with you. Every day we would start with a magnificent
breakfast and then we would get the job. Today after the day was better.
Priority was characterization and also interaction of our souls with sincerity.
Our customers were always old or seemed old. Just some of them were young. The
kid I talked before you turned back was also coming to the happy land. He
always kept telling his questions in the long run. However I never answered and
never listened to him. After passing a few days, I learnt that the kid had died
in a car accident deliberately. This circumstance woke my question up from the
kid’s death. “Who am I?” At those times, you always asked questions related to
what happened and what made me so sad. I did not utter anything. Words wanted
to escape from my mind. My conscious did not find an answer for this. It was
like it was gone. I was unconscious. Angels, superior creators wanted me to
give this an end.
As soon as I
focused on answering the question so much, you were disappeared again. This
made my way to eternity. Devastations occurred again and again. The happy land
we formed was vanished suddenly without any destruction or fatal disaster. As
long as time passed, I realized the only truth. The thing I did not have for a
long time was my conscious. It abandoned me. When you left me for the second
time, it was your disappearance from my mind forever. You never existed again
after you died. You were dead, yeah. Moreover, it was me who killed you, slaved
your soul. I was depressed in my loneliness because of my regret and
unconsciousness. I was just trying to make myself feel relax with your vision,
your dream. The place we built the happy land was your cemetery. All the
customers were the dead ones. The kid I talked was really alive and he tried to
make me turn to my own reality. Meanwhile, when I noticed all of these, I
understood one thing that I was living in my own hell because of sins I
committed. The outcome was highlighted in my mind: I got what I deserved.
